Tip #443 Choosing Cheer; Looking Out, Random Style

     If I were to ask you how you felt about being ill/injured, or what kind of demand it is on you to be a caregiver for a severely injured ill/person, what would you say? Would you say "Wow, this is the best life I've ever ever had, it's exactly what I dreamed about growing up?" Hmmmm, something tells me that will not be your first thought. And that's okay. Truly. It is hard.
     What would your first thought be then? Well, frankly it doesn't take all that much imagination to guess…. While we can learn to be content whatever our circumstances, while God's grace can be truly enough, while quality of life is possible in nearly any circumstance - even if not in conventional ways - sometimes it just feels like this whole mess of health stuff stinks. It really stinks. To say it's hard is the understatement of the century for many. It can feel like there is nothing left - no energy, no motivation, and certainly no desire to add more to our plates. The reality though is that that kind of thinking doesn't get us anywhere; acknowledging it is good, wearing it as a badge of identity is not all that conducive to cheer. You know what is conducive to cheer? Providing cheer. Yes, I know I just talked about having little energy at the moment, but stay with me for a minute or two…
     I am a woman blessed in so many ways, and have received kindness in the most unexpected places. I have been on both sides of the whole "Random Acts of Kindness" movement, and they are both especially amazing sides to be on. It doesn't take much to be kind, but it takes much (if not impossible) to forget about a kindness given to you. In no way do I want to toot my own horn, but here's a little opportunity that came up for me this week. There was an ET (not extra terrestrial… enterostomal) nurse here the other day to change out my feeding tube. ET nurses deal with holes (like a stomach hole that fits a feeding tube) and wounds (sometimes they're much like holes…) amongst other things. One of the tools she loves to use is honey. A specific kind of medical honey actually. There will be a post on the medical use of honey in wound care coming very soon, but for now allow me to say that there is a specific kind of honey that prevents (and assists in treating) infections, and has no equal when it comes to other specific kind of wound care issues. On this particular visit the nurse was interested in my brand of honey - as it was different brand and medium than what she uses in community.
     She explained to me that the type and consistency I use, paired with the method required for its use, is significantly cheaper than the current conventionally used brand (and method) in our medical community. Based on what she said, I calculated that my version (a $35 bottle for 40 doses) is significantly cheaper than the $50 version used in community for 8 doses. She told me that there is a woman she treats who desperately needs the honey treatments, else she has to continue with getting a few inches of scarring scraped from her wound each nursing visit. However, because she cannot afford the honey, and neither can she get the honey covered, once the sample she was able to get was finished, her wound was brutal again, and the scraping is the only option. Needless to say, I gave the nurse one of my bottles for her other patient (and since mine is covered, I have written the insurance company a $35 cheque).
     Amazing? No. It's a small kindness that will make a big difference. Exhausting? No; not physically, not emotionally, not hard at all. Requiring much planning? No. That wasn't possible - I didn't know of the opportunity until I was in it. It was an easy thing to do. And it was (mostly) random. And you know what? My heart is lighter.
     It is too easy to turn into ourselves, feel more introverted, and for some, to call "uncle" because we've had enough, and climb into the pit of despair. Severe illness or trauma, and caring for someone thereof can unfortunately do strange things to people… It can draw focus in, instead of encouraging one to look out. So, again, I suggest choosing cheer. Look and do something outside of yourself, despite the health of yourself or a loved one.
     I know it sounds easier to say than to do, but small things can make a huge difference. And, the small things - like smiling at someone or telling them they are doing a good job - are more than possible to carry out.. Maybe you'll find that if you build on the small things - well, then maybe they'll add up to a plethora of joy and cheer for you. That's the way it works for me. Click here to see some examples about how fun random acts of kindness can be; it's on a blog about making life beautiful and random acts of kindness definitely qualify.

Happy looking out!